The start

My whole life i have wanted to do things like writing a book or making a movie. Ways to inspire other people. But im still at that point where you know you want to do something but dont have the guts to actually do it. I yet have to figure out how to get to that part of your mind where you can just delete all the stuff that you actually dont need to be happy.

I know that there are lots of people who just live from day to day and enjoy every single moment. I do not really have a person i see as example, but i do have a type of person i would love to be myself and that is someone who looks at the days and only does what he or she wants or loves to do.

I still hope that one day i am that kind of person, but for now.... I can only think about my responsibilities and the future. And to be truthfull....i do not like what i see. At this moment i am still doing a study and only the toughts of having to do this for 2 more years is freaking me out. Dont get me wrong i love what i do. But have you never had something that in the beginning you love it so much and then when you take it to the next level..it is starting to fall apart and then there is the moment you are starting to unlove it. In most cases you then have to do a step back and when you are some time away from it you are starting to miss it and you realise why you loved it.

Well i think that is what i need. But what do you tell everyone? He guys sorry but im gonna stop for undependend time? Some people would say what is youre problem? Just go for it. And there are moments i think like that to you know. But then i think about the money i will lose and the fact that if i leave now those 2 years will be waiting for me when i get back.

I am sure there are a lot of other people who have the same problems so why would you want to read about mine? So be fair I have no clue. I was just lying in bed and started thinking about this. And i realised i could take baby steps. First i made an anonymous instagram account for my photography so i could show people my view at the world. But as wonderfull pictures can be...they are pretty much speechless. And so i started thinking about a blog. And actually when i made the decision to do this i wasnt thinking about the people who would go read it but I saw it as a way to clear my mind.

And then halfway trough this post i realised that maybe people actually are going to read this and of course everyone will have an opinion. And i am exited to hear them. Or maybe no one will ever read this. Either way this will be the place where I can empty my mind and place my thoughts.

Much love,

M